FINDING & MOVING TO MAYBERRY

In the past two months I have changed my address twice. No I did not stutter or make a mistake I did say twice. The first time was when we moved from a place that is better known as, “HELL” to a place filled with quiet while we took care of our friends pets while they were away. It gave both my fiancé and I time we needed to recompose ourselves into human beings whom do not snap at one another and find God again in our lives.

When I was young I watched, “The Andy Griffith Show” which took place in a small town called, “Mayberry RFD”. I never thought much about it when I was young other than Opie’s life was much like any other child’s life in America. He went to school, did chores, did his homework, went fishing, had friends, rode a bike, and on occasion got into trouble. His dad was the very first single dad on television, a very rare thing in the 1960’s.

As I grew up, I loved living in the suburbs of a mid-sized city, grocery stores, the mall, a bus line, within a few blocks or a few minutes ride in a car. It was when I got married, moved to rural NC, that I found myself wanting more country and less city. While the city is great for some, for me it is a place to visit from time to time, to have a nice supper or to go to “Trader Joe’s”, “Bed, Bath & Beyond”, or “Macy’s”, for me it is too busy, too congested, and just too much for this city raised country girl to handle.

After two moves, and a few complaints from my family whom live about a 30-minute drive from us in the city, we found our “Mayberry” in a small town in Mid-Ohio. According to the “Best Cities to Live in America” it ranks about #126 or so. We leave our doors open all day long, from morning until night, most nights it is way after midnight when we finally close them. It is GREAT to feel the breeze moving through the house, granted it brings in a little dust but the fresh air is wonderful! The noisiest thing we hear daily is the train, when I say noisy, I mean turn up the volume on the television, stop your conversation, LOUD. But then again, if this is the loudest it is here, I will take it. If you read my prior blog post you will find out what we had to do to get here, it was all worth it and more!!!

Small towns can be found everywhere in America. The way of life here is different, it is slower, more laid back, and definitely friendlier as we have found out. By the way ladies, no one minds if you go out of your house with no makeup, your sweats, or your flip-flops. Ken & I keep reminding ourselves, “We’re NOT in Kansas anymore” jokingly when people stop to ask how our day is going, or if we need help getting our groceries in the car, even the local Wal-Mart has a laid back, friendly, attitude unlike many of the Wal-Marts in larger markets. Here if you are out driving on Saturday or Sunday you will find roadside stands selling everything from fresh honey, homegrown veggies, homemade jams, jellies, knitted/crocheted blankets, & quilts. Another thing, farming is a way of life here, many times you will be sharing the road with John Deere’s as they move from one field to another. We haven’t made it to the local diner yet, however we will one of these days, if not for breakfast, just for coffee.

I do realize that “small town” life is not for everyone. I know this because I have friends whom will NEVER move out of Manhattan, until they trade it for a condo on the beach in Miami. While big cities may be great for some, for me it has to be “Mayberry”, where hometown parades, fireworks, county fairs, high school football games (I live in OHIO, where like Texas & Oklahoma football is a religion, so is golf for that matter!) are the norm. Where your neighbors are your friends, and you depend upon when times are bad or the weather is nasty.

As this “city girl” found out, she loves the small town life. With the birds chirping, an occasional siren or two, the daily trains, & the quiet of life. May you all find your “Mayberry” no matter where you live. God bless & have a great day!   

Moving & Finding Peace

First of all a HUGE, HUGE, HUGE, thank you goes out to wonderful friends K & E. Both K & E live their faith daily, and God sure did bless us with such great friends. As we took care of Chuck, their absolutely beautiful & loveable chocolate lab, and their sometimes temperamental kitty Miss Betty B. as they went on a much needed vacation to Colorado & other territories west. Their allowing us to move into their home gave us time to reflect upon all of the strife living in the city brought to my fiancé Ken and I. Our relationship was not going well, our faith somehow got lost, and are arguments got more heated & more often than we would have liked. Living in the peace of the country gave us time to mend our relationship with God, with each other, and figure out what we wanted and needed in a new home.

With K’s urging, we sought out the local “Penny Saver” type newspaper and found an advertisement for a three bedroom, one bath apartment, which is actually half a house. First thing both of us did was drive by the place. I was a bit taken with the “overgrown” nature of the home next door, however Ken said to give it a chance and call the ad to see if we could look at it. It took a few days but the property manager & her husband met with us, allowed us to take a look around, to open doors, cabinets, etc. We both left feeling buoyed and prayed upon it. We called the next day and agreed to meet to sign a lease. After meeting with us, both the manager and her husband prayed we would take the apartment, God lead us to other Godly people. God is great! We spent Friday looking for appliances we could afford, and moved all day Saturday & Sunday. By Sunday evening, both Ken & I were spent, both physically & mentally (making two moves one month apart will do that to anyone!). But that night, as we lie in bed in our new home we found comfort in the old but quiet neighborhood.

For a week, both Ken and I have worked hard to make this apartment ours. We’ve hung up art, put away clothes, swept, mopped, vacuumed, put in window screens, laughed at each other, and thanked God openly in pointing us in the “right direction”. All week we have enjoyed our front porch, watching the neighborhood children ride bikes, scooters, play tag, and just enjoy the atmosphere of a small town neighborhood. In regards, to the overgrown home next door, come to find out our neighbor, Mr. Ned is a good Christian man whom loves giving the neighborhood children lessons in all of the plants, trees, and flowers on his property. He is a wonderful man, whom we talk with daily and I learn from every day.

Sunday marked “one week” in our new home. We spent most of the morning on the porch sipping coffee, and watching the birds eat from our feeder and bathing in the bird bath. My love for taking pictures is back with a vengeance. I found the ebb & flow of creativity with every photo I took. I am sharing some with you here, and as I keep taking them I will keep sharing.

To all of you, my family & my friends whom prayed for us, we THANK YOU, as our prayers were answered in so very many ways. To K & E we can never repay you for what you have done for us, we will be in your debt forever.

Reality TV

This is going to be my own private rant about "Reality TV" and the more than 100, that is right I said over 100 that are on television at any time of the day or night. However I am tired of hearing & seeing about the sex lives, dancing kids with diva instructors, families with more than four kids, surviving "Naked & Afraid", or "Real Housewives" which is truly a laugh because if these women truly had to do what a "real housewife" had to do daily without all the money they wouldn't last a day, let alone a week or a month. Personally, "Keeping Up with the Kardashian's" is only glorifying how dysfunctional this very rich family is. 

Have we become so shallow or bored with our lives that we have to live vicariously through television? 

Yes, I watch reality television, some of my favorite shows are on: HGTV, A & E, Cooking Channel, PBS, Animal Planet, Science Channel, and NatGeo. I have my favorite shows like everyone does, some favorite shows are "Downton Abbey", "NCIS: LA", "Amazing Race", "Pit Bulls & Paroles", "Hell's Kitchen", "Bering Sea Gold", and "How It's Made". As you can tell by my list of stations I don't watch too much on LifeTime, TLC, ABC, NBC, OWN, or TruTv, I am trying to avoid drama in my television watching, everyday life has enough.

As I stated this is my own private rant. No animals, were harmed during its typing. 

Edward M. Kennedy Institute

Today in Boston, Massachusetts the "Edward M Kennedy Institute for The United States Senate" was dedicated and opened to the public. It isn't a shrine to the Senator whom served the people of Massachusetts for 47 as a state senator. It is a teaching tool for all people to learn how the Senate works (or doesn't work). It is very well known that Senator Kennedy crossed the aisle of the senate floor many times to make legislation work, to make life better for all of us. 

This institute is a teaching tool for our young people also. It has a full scale U.S. Senate Chamber that resembles in every way the one in Washington, D.C. where he and his brother, the late John F. Kennedy served before being elected President. This chamber is electronically equipped with interactive tablets that a group of students can use to create, argue, vote, and pass a bill into law. I for one hope that this will get much use as teachers bring their students here to use this teaching tool.

While many remember Senator Kennedy as the man whom was involved in an automobile accident at Chappaquiddick where Mary Jo Kopechne was killed. Many feel that he "got away with murder" because he was never indicted, nor faced charges in her death. I for one remember the man whom lost two brother within a few years of each other, the man whom chose public service over the private sector where he would have done well. 

I share the link below for the institute. 

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https://www.emkinstitute.org/

Some Thoughts on Fifty Shades

I keep hearing all the hype about "Fifty Shades of Grey". The women's movement call it a "how to" on abusing a woman, the religious keep calling it "porn", and others are curious as to why any woman would allow herself to be "abused" in the name of love. "The Fifty Shades of Grey" is one of the many books that can be found in any bookstore on the subject of BDSM. Some others are: "The Sleeping Beauty Quartet" by Anne Rice, "Crossfire" book series by Sylvia Day, and "The Story of O" by Pauline Reage, just to name a few. All you have to do it look for them, in my local Barnes & Noble there are shelves of books regarding BDSM. 

Ana, chooses to enter a Safe, Sane, Consensual (SSC) relationship with Christian. She chooses to allow Christian to use her body as he sees fit, for his pleasure as well as hers. Christian does not abuse her in anger, he uses implements (blindfolds, crops, restraints) to make her complaisant to his will, his pleasure, and her pleasure. A Dominant/Master(D/M) is responsible in every way for his submissive/slave's well being (mental and physical). A good D/M

will always take care of his/her sub/slave with aftercare, including but not limited to bathing her, applying salve/unguents to any mark made, holding her as she sleeps. 

A Dominant/submissive (D/s) or Master/slave (M/s) relationships exist in everyday life. Most call it "She wears the pants in that family" or "Wow, she cannot make a decision without him". If a man or woman is in a relationship where one of the partners makes all the decisions, that can be termed a dominant/submissive relationship. No relationship is without a a "stronger" partner, many times the stronger partner is the woman. Does this make it "wrong"? "No," would be the answer because it works for them. To be honest who am I to make a judgement about how any couple in today's world chooses to live their lives, their relationship, or their marriage. 

Abuse has NO place in a D/s or M/s relationship ever. A D/M NEVER hits, uses, or plays/sessions while he is angry. This is a steadfast rule of 99% of real D/M's. 

The Holy Bible states in Colossians 3:18-19 the following: "...Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them...". For me many do not understand this passage; many couples assume that it means that the "husband" should be in charge in every aspect of the relationship. But God does NOT ask the woman to be a "doormat". He[God] asks for her discernment in all things regarding to their marriage and everyday life. A very good website regarding this is, "Girls Gone Wise"[1]. 

Myself, I live in a relationship that is considered to be D/s. My fiance and I have both been part of this lifestyle for over twenty (20) years. I am not ashamed to say I am collared to my fiance, as my outward sign is a simple ring he purchased for me to wear. Do we flaunt our lifestyle? "No, we do not." Do we know others in the lifestyle, "Yes, we both do." Do we belong to a club, "No we do not at this time," both of us have been part of local BDSM scenes in our former states of residence for me New York, and he, Florida. Are there many BDSM organizations & clubs, "Yes there are many, some of them are very old and very reputable, other are what we 'Old Guard' term the 'Fly by Nights' which are here today and gone tomorrow usually run by those whom have been in the lifestyle under five (5) years, and do not know what they are doing when it comes to handling implements or handling their personal relationships." 

I know many whom are involved in this type relationship whom are doctors, lawyers, judges, nurses, and many in law enforcement, and other in all walks of life. Do we look at these people differently? "No", we look at them as people whom take care of us, whom enforce the law, and pass judgement in courtrooms. 

If you wish to read more about BDSM, I recommend the following website: "A Submissive's Voice"[2] which is written by a submissive. The blog is to help those who wish to know more about the BDSM lifestyle. 

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[1]  http://www.girlsgonewise.com/7-misconceptions-about-submission/

[2]  http://asubmissivesvoice.blogspot.com/

To Vaccinate or Not...

Since 1 January 2015 there have been 105 confirmed cases of the "Measles" in the United States[1]. This is the same Measles Virus that was considered eradicated in 2000. Why was this possible? Because parents followed the guidelines for having their children immunized against it. Why are we seeing a resurgence of this disease? Because parents are dictating to doctors what they will and will not allow their children to be treated for. What happens when their child is being registered for school, is the school district going to turn a blind eye to these parents whom refused to have their children immunized or are they going to allow them to attend school with hundreds of other children whom have been immunized or turn them away and say, "You need to home school your children or get them immunized." My thought is that school districts that allow non-immunized children into schools with children whom have been are seeking to be sued for not protecting the public.

While I do understand that part of the population does not have their children immunized because of religious beliefs (Christian Scientists and Jehovah's Witness')[2] or because they live in what most American's consider closed societies (Amish, Quakers, Mennonite). However, the Amish elders encourage parents to have all children immunized. While the jury is still out as to if immunizations cause other problems (i.e.: Autism, ADD, ADHD, etc.), the original "scientific study" that came from England in the early 2000's was de-bunked as the doctor whom wrote the findings never did the study.  

Myself, I remember having to get a MMR booster before attending college in the late 1990's. Why? Because the dose that was given during the early 1970's was considered too weak. Just this past year there was an outbreak of the mumps on the campus of The Ohio State University[4]. 

My thoughts, if you or your child are NOT immunized against early childhood diseases such as diptheria, tetnus, polio (DPT), measles, mumps, rubella (MMR), Hib, Hepatitis, et cetera[5]. Please stay away from major public attractions such as movie theaters, the mall, the zoo, Disney Parks & Attractions, Universal Studios, or any other major attraction where you or your child could infect another. 

To the unthinking, modern, know-it-all parent whom REFUSES to immunize your child/children:  YOU ARE A THREAT to my children & seven grandchildren (ages 2 to 13). 

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[1] http://www.cdc.gov/measles/cases-outbreaks.html 

[1] http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2015/02/02/us/measles-facts.html?_r=0

[2] http://www.religioustolerance.org/medical2.htm
[3] http://www.everyculture.com/multi/A-Br/Amish.html

[4] http://www.cnn.com/2014/05/16/health/ohio-mumps/

[5] http://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/schedules/hcp/imz/child-adolescent.html

Auschwitz 70 Years Later

Many of us were not alive 70 years ago, when a group of Soviet soldiers walked into a camp and found the horrors of what Nazi Germany had done to millions of people, Jews, Gypsies, Gays. They found walking skeletons, men & women starved almost to death. Then and only then did we learn that there were other camps: Auschwitz-Birkenau, Bergen-Belsen, Dauchau[1],  just to name a few of the 20,000[2] camps that Adolf Hitler used to try and wipe out whole races, primarily the Jewish race. I know that my knowledge of this subject is spotty, and not what it should be, but I do know I never want my children to live to see this again.  

Many of us are familiar with the name Anne Frank[3] whose diary was made into a play and movie "The Diary of Anne Frank", which told the story her family that hid in an attic in Amsterdam, during World War II. While many teachers and professors assign this for class, as a "reading/literature" assignment should it be used in a "history" class as a living diary of a young woman's vision of war? The world became familiar with the name Oskar Schindler[4], whom was a ethnic German spy, whom save 1,200 Jewish lives by employing them in his enamelware factory during WWII, his story was told in the movie, "Schindler's List". The first thing that struck me was the photography of this movie (being a photographer it would). But as this movie plays out, it shows the cruelty of the soldiers, the hope of those working in Mr. Schindler's factory, and the resolve of him to "rescue" as many men and women as he could. At the end of the movie, we see the families of the survivors lying stones upon the grave stone of the Schindler's. This touched me more deeply than anything else in the movie, it showed the lives not only that he saved but the families that grew out of his sacrifice. Another name many know, is Elie Wiesel [5], whom survived Auschwitz, went on to write many books including, "Night" which told of his survival at Auschwitz. Mr. Wiesel was awarded many honors including a Nobel Peace Prize, A Congressional Gold Medal, Presidential Medal of Freedom, among many other honors. 

I know that my life has been changed radically after having read some testimonies on file with the USC Shoah Foundation[6]. I also visited a local Jewish Community Center here within my city to ask for a list of reading material, only to find a memorial wall to those whom survived the Holocaust and came to live here in Columbus, OH. That day I was touched by something that I cannot to this day explain.  I find that whenever I hear or read the testimony of those whom lived through the hell of these camps, but went on with their lives because of their faith in God that He would rescue them, that He would make everything "right". How does one have that much faith, when they are in places where so much death was around them. I can only pray that I have one-tenth of their faith daily in my life. 

Have we learned anything from this period of time in our history? I am finding that the answer to this question is, "No", and maybe even a shouting of, "NO!". While we do not have one man, we have thousands trying to rid our world of those whom do not believe as they do, but we allow them to trample countries where Adolf Hitler once before trampled upon them. How can people say in one breath, "Never again," but with the next breath allow themselves to live next door to someone whom openly hates them for their faith. Is it a question of "faith"? Or just a question of "hatred"? While I am taught by my faith not to "hate" anyone, I find myself truly beginning to hate those whom use terror (bombings, be-headings, shootings, etc) to get their way.  

On Tuesday, as our world stops to lay wreaths, bow heads to pray, take time to check out one of the footnotes I have included below. 

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[1]  http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/Holocaust/cclist.html

[2]  http://www.ushmm.org/wlc/en/article.php?ModuleId=10005144
[3]  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anne_Frank
[4]  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oskar_Schindler
[5]  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elie_Wiesel

[6]  http://www.ushmm.org/research/research-in-collections/search-the-collections/shoah-foundation 

Child Abuse in the Name of Teleivison

Before I bring this blog forward I need to stress that I am ONLY a parent. Both of my children are considered "gifted". My son was not only a Junior National Rodeo Bull Riding Champion, he is mechanically gifted. What is mechanically gifted? It means that he can look at a schematic/blueprint for an engine or motor and build it. At three years old he took apart his grandpa's front grill, headlamps, and bumpers off his car, not only did he take it apart he put it back together without the help of an adult, other than to tighten all of the screws. He has always been curious as to how things work. Never did I ever get upset when his grades dropped under a "B" because he was always conscious of his grades. He turned thirty this year and I keep wondering where my little boy went. My daughter has a tested IQ of 155. She is a math and language scholar (while I can barely balance my checkbook, she can look at mine and tell me where I have gone wrong, without the aid of calculator). She picks up languages the very first time she hears them and excelled at German in high school. With my daughter school was a huge problem, she was bored during most of her classes which happens. Without a "gifted" program in our district she struggled. When she went to live with her dad in Southwest Missouri, she began following her dream of studying fine art in college. My daughter is currently a junior at the University of Missouri at Columbia in their fine arts program. Before you ask, she won her very first scholarship in 8th grade for a pencil drawing, which won an honorable mention at her county fair. Why am I telling you all of this? So you understand where I am coming from as a parent of two gifted children. My children climbed trees, rode bikes, roller bladed, skate boarded, rode horses, laughed with their friends, and learned to live life to the fullest. The only time I yelled was to call them in for supper & bedtime.

Maybe I am wrong. Maybe I am barking up the wrong tree. But does anyone feel that many of the shows that are on television seem to be exploiting children? I have already told you what I think of the TLC show "Toddlers & Tiaras".  The shows I am speaking of are on the "Lifetime Television Network". Have any of you seen "Bring It", "Child Genius" or "Dance Mom's"? I want to dissect them each on their merits, and their failures. 

BRING IT:  What it is billed as by the network is the weekly struggles of  a "Hip Hop" dance troupe. Ms. D, like Abbey Lee of Dance Mom's is a diva. I don't mean diva with a lower case "d", I mean D-I-V-A. While I do understand that practice makes perfect, I find that some of the dance moves she teaches are not only way too "adult" but are bordering on erotic. Why is that these parents do NOT see the damage that they are doing by allowing their daughters to not only dress provocatively. but allow them to perform in skin tight, nothing left to the imagination outfits, with movements that look like they came from the local strip joint. While Ms. D. has won many "trophies" and "grand championships" what is she really teaching? Is she teaching these young girls/young women that no where will anything they learn from her will be allowed on a high school or college pep or cheer leading squad. Another thing I cannot handle is how she treats the mother's. How dare you yell at me, without me, without my child, without me shelling out many thousands of dollars your "Hip Hop" dance troupe would be nothing. There are times I would love to shake some of these parents also. 

CHILD GENIUS:  At the end of this seasons show one child will walk away with a $250,000 college scholarship. Hello parents, your child will not only get a scholarship he will graduate way before his peers will. I happen to watch the one episode where one of he young men stated he wanted to "...get his driver's license at the same time he is being awarded his Ph. D...". This young man who is about 11-13 years old is amazingly bright, but he also has a sense of humor about his abilities. I only watched one episode of this show, at the end I was crying for the children. As I stated at the beginning of this I am the parent of two gifted children. Did I sit with my children as thy did homework? I sure did. Did I force them to sit for hours memorizing facts? Absolutely NOT. I raised two children whom l sent outside to play, because when a child plays they are also learning. These children are so traumatized when being eliminated from this show. I think competition is VERY healthy for every child, however berating your child because they answered a question wrong, which they ended up breaking down into tears, they needed your love, your understanding, your arms around them reminding them that you "LOVE" them unconditionally.

DANCE MOMS: Oh Abbey Lee, what a D-I-V-A you are. You are an out of shape, out of control dance teacher that screams at the parents, whom by the way pay your salary, keep a roof over your head, and a barre in your dance studio. Every season you get worse, you demand more, you berate more, and still have not figured out that many of the problems with the parents you created. I stopped watching after the second season, but one cannot miss the previews on other networks for this show. 

I am tired of our children being used as pawns by the adults that are supposed to love them. These parents need to be turned in for "child abuse". Child abuse has many forms, they very worst form of child abuse is VERBAL. When you say something to your child or children that is negative, that statement will ALWAYS be there to haunt them. God gave us children to love, as a gift, to nurture to grow them as you would grow a flower or tree. What we teach our children, they in turn teach their children. 

I will put away my soapbox, and go back to my bench to watch the world go by.